{"id":105776,"date":"2023-06-16T21:28:00","date_gmt":"2023-06-17T01:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=105776"},"modified":"2026-01-21T14:00:05","modified_gmt":"2026-01-21T18:00:05","slug":"how-to-say-no-to-an-invitation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-say-no-to-an-invitation\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Say No to an Invitation &amp; Protect Your Unhurried Lifestyle"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Do you get invited to things that don&#8217;t add to your life in a meaningful way? Would you like to protect the life you&#8217;ve worked hard to create?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In <em>The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry, <\/em>pastor John Mark Comer explores our cultural obsession with rushing and how it&#8217;s harmful. He shares insights on how to stop rushing through a hectic life. Then, he advises you to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/when-to-say-no\/\">set boundaries<\/a> and turn down opportunities that would interfere with your new lifestyle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Continue reading to learn how to say no to an invitation when it comes your way and keep your unhurried life intact.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-how-to-say-no-to-an-invitation\">How to Say No to an Invitation<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Comer argues that you can escape the culture of rushing by following the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/jesus-lifestyle\/\">lifestyle of Jesus<\/a> who wasted no time but enjoyed a healthy pace. Then, he shows you how to <em>maintain<\/em> these habits as new obligations and opportunities threaten to make your days more rushed or encroach on your spiritual practice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Comer insists that you must <strong>protect your lively lifestyle by<\/strong> <strong>regularly turning down opportunities<\/strong> that you don\u2019t have the time or the capacity for. When you learn how to say no to an invitation, you can use that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/time-to-focus\/\">time to focus<\/a> on things that really matter\u2014your health, relationships, connection to God, and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/find-purpose-in-your-life\/\">life purpose<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For inspiration on turning down opportunities, look to Jesus. According to Comer, <strong>Jesus <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/hub\/personal-life\/relationships\/personal\/how-to-set-healthy-boundaries\/\">set boundaries<\/a> to prevent additional obligations from making his lifestyle rushed.<\/strong> For instance, he refused several invitations to preach when those opportunities conflicted with his scheduled prayer time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: By refusing invitations to preach so he could pray, Jesus opted to commit to one spiritual activity <em>fully<\/em>, instead of packing his schedule with multiple spiritual activities. This example of boundary-setting may be particularly useful for Christians and church leaders who tend to overcommit to spiritual endeavors. In <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ivpress.com\/an-unhurried-life\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>An Unhurried Life<\/em><\/a>, pastor Alan Fadling explains that Christians today tend to see their ability to pack their schedules with worship-related activities as a testament to their faithfulness. Fadling advises Christians to remember that God <em>appreciates<\/em> the devotion behind their many worship-related activities, but <em>prefers<\/em> it when they\u2019re engaged in a slower, more intentional connection with him\u2014as Jesus did.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><strong>Tips for Turning Down Opportunities<\/strong><br><br>It can be challenging to turn down opportunities, especially ones that sound fun and meaningful. In <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/essentialism\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>Essentialism<\/em><\/a><em>, <\/em>Greg McKeown offers several tips for saying \u201cno\u201d to new opportunities:<br><br><strong>Consider opportunity costs.<\/strong> It\u2019s easier to say \u201cno\u201d when you identify what you\u2019d miss out on by saying \u201cyes.\u201d For instance, say your friend invites you to take a surfing class with them\u2014but each session would require a two-hour commute to and from the beach. Think about what you could do instead of driving, like attending church or playing with your kids.<br><br><strong>Separate people from their requests. <\/strong>When someone asks you to do something for or with them, you may worry that saying \u201cno\u201d will make them feel rejected. Remember that the person making the request is more than their request\u2014you can say \u201cno\u201d <em>and<\/em> maintain your close connection to them. For instance, tell your friend, \u201cI can\u2019t commit to the class because the commute is too long, but let\u2019s still plan to get together weekly somewhere closer to home.\u201d<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you get invited to things that don&#8217;t add to your life in a meaningful way? Would you like to protect the life you&#8217;ve worked hard to create? In The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry, pastor John Mark Comer explores our cultural obsession with rushing and how it&#8217;s harmful. He shares insights on how to stop rushing through a hectic life. Then, he advises you to set boundaries and turn down opportunities that would interfere with your new lifestyle. Continue reading to learn how to say no to an invitation when it comes your way and keep your unhurried life intact.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":105782,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,43,6],"tags":[1068],"class_list":["post-105776","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle","category-self-improvement","category-spiritual","tag-the-ruthless-elimination-of-hurry","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Say No to an Invitation &amp; Protect Your Unhurried Lifestyle - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"When you learn how to say no to an invitation, you can use that time to focus on things that really matter. 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