{"id":104090,"date":"2023-05-28T11:28:00","date_gmt":"2023-05-28T15:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=104090"},"modified":"2023-06-02T13:40:16","modified_gmt":"2023-06-02T17:40:16","slug":"how-to-self-reflect","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-self-reflect\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Self-Reflect and Cope With Secondary Trauma"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>What&#8217;s the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/importance-of-reflection\/\">importance of self-reflection<\/a>? How does reflecting on yourself help workers in trauma care?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>People who help others cope with their trauma should be praised for the work they do. But these heroes sometimes forget that they need to take care of themselves, as well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you&#8217;re one of these people, keep reading to learn how to self-reflect and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-improve-your-overall-health\/\">improve your health<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-how-to-make-time-for-reflection\"><strong>How to Make Time for Reflection<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>According to Laura van Dernoot Lipsky&#8217;s book <em>Trauma Stewardship<\/em>, embracing a more mindful approach to trauma care means <strong>regularly knowing how to self-reflect on your needs, motivations, and emotions<\/strong>. You can do this by setting aside a small window of time in the morning for reflection. You can also practice <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/eckhart-tolle-meditation-mindfulness\/\">meditation<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/breathing-exercises-for-beginners\/\">breathing exercises<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Lipsky explains that understanding ourselves is key to processing the effects that secondary trauma has on us. Often, we get so caught up in our daily routines and work stresses that we lose connection to our personal needs and the reasons why we wanted to help others in the first place. This can cause us to feel like we have no control or options in our lives when we really do.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: In <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/who-will-cry-when-you-die\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>Who Will Cry When You Die?<\/em><\/a>, Robin Sharma recommends you <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/who-will-cry-when-you-die\/part-2\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">reflect on your purpose every morning and at the end of each day<\/a> to be more connected to your personal needs, purpose, and motivations. He argues that thinking about <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/your-life-purpose\/\">your purpose<\/a> every morning allows you to eliminate unnecessary obligations from your schedule. Every night, Sharma suggests you reflect on your purpose by writing about any lessons and experiences you had during the day. This helps you assess whether you\u2019re living according to your purpose so that you can better adjust your mindset and actions tomorrow.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When you practice reflection, ask yourself: \u201cWhat is my reason for doing what I\u2019m doing?\u201d This question helps you realize that trauma doesn\u2019t control you and that you have a choice in what to focus on when working with trauma. Lipsky recommends you discuss your reasons with people you trust or write them down as a reminder for the future. As you reflect on your reasons, consider whether continuing in your current work is good for your health. It\u2019s possible that the work you do may no longer be in your best interest if it\u2019s negatively impacting your well-being.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Beyond posing yourself questions or discussing your reasons with others, consider <a href=\"http:\/\/tandfbis.s3.amazonaws.com\/rt-media\/pp\/common\/sample-chapters\/9780415897907.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">visualizing a personal wellness meter<\/a> to regularly assess your needs and determine whether your work has become harmful to your well-being. Imagine your meter has a green zone, a yellow zone, and a red zone, with green meaning you\u2019re at your best and red meaning you\u2019re distressed and overwhelmed. Picture in detail how it might look and imagine putting it on a dock that tells you how much stress and trauma you experienced during the entire workday.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>One reason many people engage in trauma work, Lipsky explains, is a desire for <em>trauma mastery<\/em>\u2014a coping mechanism to recapture a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/an-internal-locus-of-control\/\">sense of control<\/a> that they didn\u2019t have during a past traumatic experience. For example, you might work in the medical field if you had lost a loved one to illness when you were younger.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If trauma mastery is part of the reason you pursue your line of work, Lipsky advises that you <strong>seek support and healing for your original trauma<\/strong> so you don\u2019t use your work as the main way to cope with your trauma. People with personal stakes tied to their work, she argues, might put an unhealthy amount of pressure on themselves. One way you can better understand how to manage your desire for trauma mastery while working with the trauma of others is by studying how others have dealt with their personal trauma while involved in trauma work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: The urge to reengage with your past trauma is called <a href=\"https:\/\/www.medicalnewstoday.com\/articles\/repetition-compulsion\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>repetition compulsion<\/em><\/a>. According to psychologists, this compulsion happens when you\u2019re unable to resolve or heal your former trauma. This causes some trauma survivors to want to repeat similar situations and causes others to engage in trauma work as a way to regain a sense of control. Pursuing trauma mastery can be damaging because repeating traumatic events rarely leads to a feeling of mastery and only increases your exposure to trauma. However, certain variations of reenactment, like telling stories about a deceased loved one, may have positive effects for coping with the trauma of the loss.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What&#8217;s the importance of self-reflection? How does reflecting on yourself help workers in trauma care? People who help others cope with their trauma should be praised for the work they do. But these heroes sometimes forget that they need to take care of themselves, as well. If you&#8217;re one of these people, keep reading to learn how to self-reflect and improve your health.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":23872,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16,9,43],"tags":[1045],"class_list":["post-104090","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health","category-psychology","category-self-improvement","tag-trauma-stewardship","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Self-Reflect and Cope With Secondary Trauma - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Workers in healthcare often forget to tend to their own needs and emotions. 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